Review for Getting a Clue Chapter 1 from Andromalius on November 10, 2008

I actually like the Harry/Hermione pairing - and I still hate this. You're supposed to write a plausible romance, not attempt to apply a revisionist brush over canon in order to bullshit the audience into accepting it. Testing the traffic, given the lack thereof at FFNet? Use your common sense. If this isn't even worthy of FFnet - the cesspool of literature - then it isn't worthy of this site. How do you do it? You have every favorable circumstance, and yet you still managed to write so badly that the readership fen the dark corners of the world would like this. If you have any self-respect, take this down. Never approach this site again. Just stick to FFnet. Or not. Stuff like this is great for when competent writers want to feel better about themselves. Just get a clue.

Review for Getting a Clue Chapter 1 from Kyle_Dodge1 on November 10, 2008

I have a question. Are you always as condescending to your reviewers as you were to Sesc? Your retort to Sesc had quite a lot of venom and attempted to be witty and aloof. Too bad I couldn't shake the image of a thirteen year-old girl crying and cutting herself as I read it. I just can't fathom where your confidence in your own writing came from. Surely you haven't been complemented on your writing before? Reading Sesc's review was far more entertaining than reading the chapter it followed. If Sesc was reading it wrong, how the hell is it supposed to be read?

Review for Getting a Clue Chapter 1 from Dark Asator on November 09, 2008

Ugh, what a smell! Must be the troll. Did you shit yourself, troll?Did you know this is a site for QUALITY HP fanfiction? Ah, but of course, let me describe... quality = having a high degree of excellence Your fic is like a pit filled with baked dog shit; it has quantity but not quality. GTFO

Review for Getting a Clue Chapter 1 from Alssn on November 09, 2008

Have you ever heard about commas? They are very useful when you're writing something. Anything. I will just assume that with your poor grammar you were trying to make story less readable and make everyone fail to notice how awful it is. No such luck – romance is horrible, and the whole chapter doesn't hold an ounce of interest.

Review for Getting a Clue Chapter 1 from Sesc on November 08, 2008

Well, I'll try to restrain myself, as I hate Hermione and any comment from me on anything regarding her is biased by default. Lines regarding her like "What would I do without her? She is my guiding light." make me gag, and reading “You’re... well you’re my reason for living… I love you so much it hurts…” is about as enjoyable as a papercut. So I wont talk about her, I'll talk about Harry and Romance in general. Question: Why do people always assume that writing a Romance story is the most easy kind of story to write? Why does everyone chose this as their first attempt? Because it isn't, you know. It's incredible hard to get the emotions and reactions right. Even more, I'd go as far as to say that it's the hardest genre to write in, because it's always a balancing act – to not make too sappy or unrealistic, for example. Furthermore, you have to keep track of so many details – emotions, reactions, behaviour – it’s as complex as human nature, which you will agree is quite complex. So to get back to your story: One does not realise that one loves someone else in the span of 0.538 seconds. It's a quite the process up to that point. And most importantly, one does NOT propose after 1.327 additional seconds. I hope for your sake, that you never try that on your first girlfriend/boyfriend once you get one. (I'm assuming here that you never had one, since I can't explain the lack of credibility otherwise). The best you could hope for would be that she laughs in your face, and quite frankly, that's what Hermione should have done here. So no, it's not cute. It's not sweet. It's completely unrealistic and stupid and gives the reader the impression that you have no real idea what you're writing about. The Romance part of this story is bad. And since that is the *only* part, this story is bad. Oh – I just remembered, there actually is another part. I almost forgot that. What is McGonagall doing in the Girls' Dorm? o.O I assume you are in a school. So you should know how realistic it is that a teacher and a student discuss other people’s love life like old buddies. Does *your* teacher consider drugging you pals? To sum it up: It’s your first story and that shows. But we all wrote our fist story once, and we all improved. So what can you do? My tip is: read more and see how other authors write romance, if you really do want to keep writing it. Alternatively, try a different genre, there are enough. If you want to stay within Harry Potter FF for that, here are just two exemplary works: Lessons, by kendrawriter (Harry/Angelina), and Rustlings in the Dark by Neisseria (Harry/Padma). The latter you’ll find here, the former only at fanfiction.net

Author reply
oh dear its always amusing how people think they know all about me from one piece of work. while this was my first venture into the HPFF world it was actually written a while back (about 2 years) and is now posted here as i recently found the site and use this as a test on traffic. i would suggest that if you don't like Hermione then you probably shouldn't review H/Hr works at all. you may notice that within cannon in there is a large precedence for the teachers and students interacting outside what is the normal student teacher relationships and I'm sorry that you haven't been party to having friendships with your teachers perhaps this explains some things about your comments. i myself managed to get on well with my teachers and in my last year of High school i had a solid offcampus friendship with 3 members of he staff. however i have read your review and rather than dismissing it out of hand as crap which is obviously what you have done with my story i have taken the time to simply conclude that you have failed to read the work properly. being as i don't know you or your educational or professional background i wont say much more about the tips you feel able to give me. in closing you are free to your opinions and thanks for the comment. but being as they ate your opinions ill fee free to ignore them